Relationships. Where do we start? Some people thrive in them, yet there are others who struggle in them. By that sentence alone, you would have already identified which category you fall under.
Not a single relationship is identical to another, which is what makes every single one so special. Many of us grew up watching fairytales where there is always a happy ending. So naturally, we all grew up expecting relationships to be perfect.
As we grow up, we enter relationships and experience love, and eventually realise that love isn’t that simple. The truth is, it will never be like the movies.
In this article, we are going to share with you the common issues faced in a relationship and a few tips on how to overcome them.
#1 You Feel Like Your Partner Does Not Love You As Much As Before
Let’s face it. Everyone goes through this phase where we start thinking that our partner loves and wants us less than they did in the beginning. It may be because your partner is spending less time with you, texting you back much slower, texting you in a colder tone, calling less, etc. But is it true? This is one of the leading causes of an argument and lots of frustration, doubts and stress will start to pile up in vast amounts. And this is where you start questioning your partner’s love for you.
#2 Both Of You Start To Have Different Goals
This is the deal breaker for many relationships. Having a partner means growing together. We’re not saying that both of you have to be on the same page all the time, because everyone grows differently. But if you start thriving alone for a prolonged period of time rather than together with your partner, it is really saying something about your relationship.
#3 You Are Tired Of Repeating What Upsets You
This can get extremely frustrating, and it often leads to very heated arguments. This is the phase where all the “I have said this so many times, why don’t you get it?” and “Don’t you know that I hate it when you do this?” start coming out every single day. You start retweeting tweets that say “If you have to repeat yourself again and again to someone, they obviously have no respect for you.” and this is where you start questioning your partner’s respect for you.
#4 Little Things Trigger Big Fights
Just like how a tiny detonator can trigger a huge explosion, this is very similar to the triggers in arguments. It can be something as simple as misplacing a shirt, forgetting to take out the trash or replying your partner just a few minutes later than usual… And that’s it. You start quarrelling for an entire day, or even putting up a cold war to see who loses out first.
#5 You Get Turned Off By Your Partner’s Mindset
This does not happen to all couples, but it is a very real issue in many relationships as well. Your partner may start behaving or thinking in a certain way that makes you go all “Do you seriously think like that?” or “Why do you have to see things this way?” You may even feel a sense of repulsion against them, because their mindset just ‘disgusts’ or irritates you.
So how do we solve these issues without breaking up?
Many relationships fail NOT because of the problems that they face, but because of they were not communicated or handled well. Instead of solving them, many people find it easier to walk away or give up on the relationship just because they don’t see the point in fixing it. They let their emotions overwhelm their rational thinking, and often choose to walk out.
In the past, when things were broken, people would always find a way to fix them. Now, when things are broken, some prefer to replace them. This does not only apply to material things, but to relationships as well. We often choose to find someone new when we are tired of fighting with the one we love. But that is not how it should be.
If every couple decides to leave each other just because they struggle a lot with their relationship problems or simply because they are sick and tired of fighting with each other, there would be little to no married couples in the world anymore. So what exactly keeps two people together? Let’s take you through a few points.
#1 Communication Is Key
It is not simple to talk things out. For some people, it may be. But for others who have trouble expressing themselves or for those who do not really know what they want out of a relationship, it can be very difficult. However tough it may be, you have to do it. Talk things out with your partner with an open heart. Let each other know your likes and dislikes, your thoughts and your feelings. Without communicating these to each other, you and your partner won’t understand each other. Without understanding, there can be no harmony. You may have heard this many times, but communication is really one of the most important factors in a relationship. You cannot expect someone to understand you inside out without first telling them what you are like. Instead of leaving the relationship, find the right time to sit down with your partner and tell each other why you did the things you did, why you feel the way you do, etc.
#2 Check On Your Partner
Both of you may be together but both of you will definitely still have your own struggles. Whether it is work, school, family; sometimes your partner may be going through something without telling you, but don’t misunderstand. Some people tend to keep their own problems to themselves and would rather suffer in silence than to let you know, because they either do not want to seem vulnerable or they simply do not want to burden you. If you ever notice something’s off about your partner, do not just go off on them. Ask them if they’re okay, ask them if everything’s fine in school, at work or at home. Just because you aren’t made aware of something, does not necessarily mean that it is not there. While checking up on them every now and then, don’t get upset if they don’t tell you immediately as well. Some people take a longer time to open up as compared to others. The whole process can be a long wait, but if you love someone, learn to have the patience to go at their pace during these times.
#3 Talk About Your Goals, Future and Ambitions Together
We mentioned earlier that this is often a deal breaker for many relationships. There have been countless relationships that ended because the two people have noticed that they are going on two very different paths in life. This is not anyone’s fault, maybe it is just not meant to be. But if you and your partner really do want to continue your life journey together, talk about the plans you have in mind. Ask them about what they want in the future too. Sure, the future is unpredictable. But it can be what you make it, if you want it badly enough. If you truly want your partner to be with you, work out a plan together for your future. There is no point in staying if either one of you doesn’t see a future with the other.
#4 Encourage Each Other
Encouragement from the right person can really be a huge source of empowerment. Whether you or your partner are struggling or not, make it a habit to encourage each other. Once a day is good enough, but for those who are fighting a battle, remember to give them a little pep talk more frequently. If there is no emotional or moral support in your relationship, what are you still doing in it?
#5 Be Consistent
Okay, we live in a fast-paced world. Things are always changing and evolving really quickly, including relationships. So it is very common to see changes in your partner every once in awhile. Change is the only constant, right? BUT, get this. Consistency is also extremely vital in a relationship. The lack of it is the reason why you or your partner will start throwing “You have changed.” or “You don’t love me anymore.” at each other. No, seriously. So be consistent with your effort. It does not matter if you have a hectic schedule or not, but you have to make the effort to at least try and be consistent to your partner. Now, we are not saying you should be on the phone 24/7 with them, sending them home every other day or that you have to take them out to dinner every single day. You may not be able to give them the fullest attention at work as compared to when you are free, but at least drop them a text to let them know that even in your busy schedule, they are still on your mind when you get a break. Little things can go a long way.
There are endless issues in a relationship, and there are many other ways to try and solve them as well. These are just a few tips that we feel are extremely important to know, and we hope they help you find peace with your partner.
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